Dating: This cat does not want to go phishing thanks.

Oh where do I begin... As you all know (as I have shoved it in your faces repeatedly) I am single and there are many, many reasons for this. And, as you all know I have ventured onto the dating scene, had one date which went well but not going to push something that didn't feel right, and been talking to many others.

Until, I met this one person, and I say person because suspicions were ringing out the minute the conversation started. If he (?) didn't feel they could be themselves to me then that is what makes me not want to know them.  I do not understand the need to pretend to be someone you are not. Ask the poor date I had, I literally laid bones on the table and said there, don't like it then hah! So why pretend to be someone you are not? I've watched Catfish and have seen where it can all lead.

I know there are people who just feel the need to lie, and they end up living some imaginary life where the lines between fiction and reality become blurred. Still, what is so wrong with being who you are?

The times are not like they used to be thirty-years ago. The Marty Mcfly of this era is seen as a trend now, the gamer who sits in the converted gaming room is someone to aspire to. The black hair and dark makeup that gives you your look doesn't send old people running across the road in fear anymore. I am me, a numpty and a prat at the best of times, but it's me. I have debts, I drive a car that has more disco warning lights than nuclear reactor, and I'm human. I burp (at the wrong times) and blow off (if i'm asleep I do wake myself to excuse it :s) but i'm me. I got hit by a car years ago and have a big scar on my forehead that turns to a lump when i frown - I just tell people my brains too big to fit in my head. But, I don't have to look at it, so if others have an issue, they can look away.

I don't want to have to put pictures in to google image search to check that a person is who they say they are. Life's too short for having to worry about all that. Still, I don't think i'll be one of the lucky to meet a partner on the sites, so i'll go back to meeting at the pub or in town.

I say that now, but what will i tell you all about if i did haha?
Watch this space.

Writing a synopsis and sticking pins in eyes comes to mind

OK, to clarify I of course mean sticking pins in my own eyes, not just randomly running up to someone in the street and attacking them with implements from my sewing box. No, I genuinely would rather gut myself than have to write this... But I've done it anyway.

Now, there are some agents who want a full synopsis consisting of no more than 4 pages, and then there are others who want no more than 500 words. Meh (my brain gags at the thought) if I could keep things under 500 words than I'd be writing short stories too.
1) Pick out key points... My whole book is key points.
2) Convey character emotions... In 500 words are you joking?
3)Don't lose the plot - Did that years ago.

So, after a short break away visiting family and friends, and a painfully long journey back on the M6 (which is another story), I sat down and began.
I started by writing the synopsis as Girl meets boy, boy does this, girl does this, boy screws up etc. I then changed boy and girl to the characters names, and then worked on it until something somewhat decent was left. That was 487 words. A few people have read it over and they have said it can be cut more. More? Would a synopsis of 'They meet, they fight, and then the twist..' suffice? I have read so many blogs, authors, writers and more on this subject, and still it seems to be down to one thing - Sitting down and just doing it.

I have also created a spreadsheet of Agents to send submissions to, using the Writers and Artists yearbook 2016. If I can get just one asking for a full MS out of the 10 or so I'm submitting to, then i'll know I've done something right. Otherwise, I'll just try and try again. Beats sitting on my butt scratching my head and picking my nose anyway.

If what I have written is any good, then I will of course share with you what I have done, but if it's pants and ends me in the round file then I wouldn't want anyone facing the same fate through my own errors. Instead I will write a what not to send, kind of like what not to say on a first date post.

Will keep you all updated on the progress...

:-)

Things not to say on a date - no idea why i'm sharing this...

I recently started dating again, after a few years of being single. And, it wasn't for lack of trying nor was it that I'm labelled 'reject' and been left on the shelf. No, it was more to do with the fact that as we get older we get nervous, worried about all the things that didn't matter when we were teenagers. Meeting people seems to be harder as we get older, now i'm only 31...but still it's harder. So anyway i joined Match.com - and wow it's expensive. But I have met many walks of life through it. Sometimes i think people join just to talk to someone, which i'm more than happy to do.
Being single doesn't suck that badly, if anything i'm so used to my own company that i have developed a masculine side. I can plaster, paint - laid a concrete base and laid a patio, flat-packs i love to hate...The list is endless, but does that emasculate men to make me less appealing? I was so used to being single I actually down-graded my bed to a small double lol. After making new friends on these sites, some who will never shake me because i'm annoying like The Flu, I (and a few coerced friends) joined Plenty of Fish. I deleted it after about two hours. What are people thinking when they type things out? Trust me, crude innuendo (and i know my innuendo) isn't a great chat up line.

Maybe forcing things, romance, isn't the way to go. It's like London Bus Syndrome - When you want one, there's none to be seen, and then when you don't want one they all come at once.
Meh, it's all so hard...kissing a new person, worrying about them seeing all your lumps and bumps with the lights on...do they snore? Will i sleep with my mouth open and dribble? How and why do we put ourselves through this?

My friend, married for years, said, "I don't think i could do it." I agree with her, I don't think i can do this. For a fact, my brain and my mouth have a very different Idea of what is acceptable to say.

Things not to say on a date: And yes I've said them! All of them!

"I was told Ikea made Kia cars."

"I'd love to go to the country Australasia for holiday."

"Once i was so drunk, i was sick and i blew off at the same, didn't realise my BF was behind my bum." - Multitasking or what!?!

"Sorry i keep playing with my hair, i'm trying to be lady-like."

Lol, I'm not embarrassed by the things I've done. Nor do i regret them. Sure I do regret telling people those things across a dinner table. That moment when they realise 'What the hell have i agreed to?'

Maybe I need to go on a How-to-date course or something. The problem is I can be very open. Too open. (Not that open, tut-tut).
Oh i don't know, I just hope there are others out there who have said or done similarly embarrassing things so i don't feel like the only one. Then again being unique maybe isn't all that bad?

Sorry for rambling ha!

Shoe Size 4, so I will act that way just for an hour or two...

Whilst working on book 4 of The Play Series, I became distracted, thanks to snapchat. The saying act your age not your shoesize, well my feet are a size 4 and I'm happy with that.

Today's work went something like this...
Promotions

Then this...

Which resulted in me uploading it, now if you've ever looked at my Facebook author page, my Twitter or Instagram you'll know I have never been hip and down with the kids! I have never put my selfies up for people to see and the above is why, but today I did...

And then there was more I was just having a ball all on my own hahaha...

 rocking this look

Okay i really want a husky!

 Sultry look which was supposed to be evil i guess?!?

Okay craziness over... no more posing today - though I do need to sort out some kind of 'Authorish' picture. But where's the fun in that?

I'm not always in fantasy land when writing, sometimes, you just have to engage with your inner juvenile-self that is screaming to have fun

Oh and...FYI I have a jumper i slob around in when i'm working and IT IS CLEAN, i just wear/wash/wear/wash so you'll see me in it ALOT!!

Hope your day was as fun as mine!

#FREE #EBOOK on #KINDLE The Play Series

Hey everyone, sorry I have been away for a week or two. Watchers, the book i was writing has actually gone through a massive overhaul and has changed, as i said it might. Anywhooo... Play the Ace was launched 2 days ago, and it's reception has been mind blowingly amazing! I can't thank you enough for all the support and encouragement i have received. That being said, I am giving the first book Play me Away, away for free for the next 5 days. So grab your copy, maybe shelf it until you have time to read, but please review it after. I don't mind if you hate it, let's face it, it's like a steak and everyone like's theirs done differently.

https://goo.gl/fDYf6E

Click the link and read at your leisure. 

Thank you all

xx

P.S Watchers will be resuming next week.

P.P.S It will read completely differently so you may want to watch for the first chapters re-release

Thank you :-)

xxx